Love & Relationships
Your child scored highest on our group of emotions we label, Love and Relationships. Don’t worry, this is a common struggle for many children and there are some really practical ways you can help them grow within these emotions!
First though, to better understand how this works, it is important to note that this grouping is just a label – it is a way to think about the underlying emotions we will explore more in a moment. Love and Relationships represent the thread that ties all of these specific emotions your child is struggling with together. It is the underlying emotional core of each of these issues, even if the issues themselves are more specific. So don’t worry about the label (and don’t label your child this way). Instead, let's focus on the core issues and practical methods you can implement to help them get through these emotional struggles.
The issues that fall under the Love and Relationships group are: Love, Relationships, Loneliness, Belonging, Empathy, Connection. Let's explore them in more detail below.
Delve Deeper into the Emotions
Love is like a big, warm hug that makes your kids feel happy and safe. It grows just by having someone to play with, read stories to them, and make them feel special. Love is knowing that no matter what, you will always be there, showering them with affection and making them feel like the most important person in the world.
To help your young child know and feel your love, show physical affection through hugs, kisses, and gentle touch, letting them feel your warmth and care. Spend quality time with them, fully present and engaged, participating in activities they enjoy. Use words to express your love explicitly, saying "I love you" often and telling them why you love them. Additionally, listening attentively goes a long way to validating their feelings and demonstrating that their thoughts and emotions are important to you.
Relationships are the special connections your kids have in their life with you, their wider family and their close friends. Think of the warm feelings your kids get when they play together, share toys, and have fun adventures. They feel safe and supported when you love them, listen to them, hug them, and show them kindness. Good relationships mean being kind, sharing, and being a good friend or family member.
To support your kids' relationships with their friends (and you), talk about kindness, reflect back positively when they do kind things. When they are unkind, avoid shaming. Instead ask “What could have been kinder?” Model how to apologize by taking responsibility often so they can learn from your communication style. At the end of the day, help your kids list all the people who were part of their day and be grateful for them in their life.
Loneliness is when your kids feel sad because they miss having someone to be with and talk to. It can make them feel a bit lost or left out. It's a feeling that tells you that they want more connection, to be around others, and have friends to play and share with.
Spending time together and doing things that they enjoy will reduce their loneliness. It’s easy to invite their friends over to play, or to go to a park where they can make new friends. It's also important to validate their feelings of loneliness. Sometimes we just have to hang out with the uncomfortable feelings together. They will pass.
When your kids feel like they are accepted, valued, loved, and included then they will feel like they belong. Then they know they are an important member of their family or special groups. You only need two caring people to create a feeling of belonging. Sometimes in a group, your kids will be quicker to notice when they feel excluded, and start believing that they don't belong.
The first place to create belonging is in your family. Do fun things together as a family to feel close and connected. Laugh together, hold hands, and go on adventures. Create consistent rituals for celebrating birthdays and holidays. Help your kids to join groups where they make friends while learning a new skill, like music, or their favorite sport. It’s also important to make one-on-one time with each child to grow feelings of belonging.
Sometimes your child may feel sad, even if it's not obvious on the outside. Sadness can be caused by various things like loss, illness, or simply feeling a bit down. Kids are sensitive so it may be a reaction to a small thing that you don’t even notice. Your child may be trying to figure out why they aren't as happy as they want to be. Look beyond the obvious clues of sniffles and tears for signs of decreased energy, and a withdrawal from connection.
To help, a massive dose of encouragement is necessary. Celebrate them and their activities. Help them understand that it’s OK to be sad – it doesn’t need to be a dirty feeling. But more than anything, just ask a lot of questions so they start getting the thoughts out of their head and into the world to deal with. This will help them to quiet the noise and see that maybe the sadness they feel is actually something else completely .
It's a wonderful moment when you see your kids feeling Calm. It's like they found a cozy spot or are listening to soft music that makes them feel peaceful and relaxed. When they feel calm, their body feels at ease, their breathing becomes slow and steady, and their thoughts become clear and quiet. Kids love to feel calm and peaceful within themselves and harmony in their environment.
When calm is missing, the brain can actually forget that it's even possible. It’s our job to remind them by calming ourselves and holding our center especially when they can’t. We can literally transmit our feelings of peacefulness to their nervous system through our breath, gentle touch, eye contact, and presence. This can take a few minutes before they regulate again, so be patient. It’s very helpful to encourage and support natural moments of calm when they happen. You can say “Your arms are relaxed. Your eyes are closed. You look calm.” At another time you can ask “What does calm feel like to you? What makes you lose it? I will help you remember when you lose it.”
Seeing empathy in your 4-year-old is a heartwarming experience. It's when they show a deep understanding of how others feel and genuinely care about making them happy. You can see their kindness shine through as they put themselves in someone else's shoes and offer comfort and support.
The fastest way to help your kids grow empathy is to lead by example. Discuss different perspectives and how others might feel in various situations. You can begin to identify other people's emotions by asking “What do you think that person is feeling?” followed by “What helps you when you are feeling like that?” This grows awareness and kindness. You can also discuss how characters in a book may feel, and why. It helps to encourage sharing, cooperation, and acts of kindness towards others.
When you see your kids forming special bonds and friendships that bring them joy and happiness, you know they are experiencing connection. It’s a joy to witness the magic of connection as they engage in play, share their experiences, and create memories with others. When they are connected, it makes them feel happy, safe and loved.
Paired breathing, like the Snuggle Breathing Meditation is one of the fastest ways to create connection. It's a great ritual to start your storytimes. Kids love to be helpful, so choose activities that promote cooperation and teamwork, giving them clear tasks to help. This creates feelings of belonging and connection. It's always fun and supportive to do things together that you both enjoy, like playing games or reading books.
Meet 22 lovable characters who overcome life's challenges to find peace, love, and connection.
We Make Mindfulness Kid-Friendly
Each bedtime story guides you through snuggle-breath meditation, a mindful journey, and conscious conversation.
The Conscious Bedtime community connects conscious caregivers who seek a richer relationship with their children.
Parents and Children LOVE Our Books!
★★★★★Dr Shefali Tsabary
"Andrew’s books allow parents to ease into themselves so that they can open the space for deeper connection with their children at night."
Author of The Conscious Parent and The Awakened Family; Clinical Psychologist
"These books are a glimpse of the future of what early childhood education will be. These books teach critical skills of life and emotions and how to understand and process events in life."
"Beautiful illustrations help you and your kiddo start meaningful conversations. Highly encourage parents that are passionate about teaching more self awareness and intention to consider these stories as a tool to connect at a deeper level."
Help Your Child With The Most Common Emotional Struggles
Over years of research and working with children, we've identified 4 key areas where children commonly encounter emotional challenges as they grow up. Each of these core struggles contains a number of distinct emotions that your children will need to learn about so they can thrive.
Fear and Anxiety
Love and Relationship
Anger and Rebellion
The Inspiration Behind The Books
The last 20 minutes of each day helps children integrate their day's lessons and experiences, allows them to let go of negativity, and fall asleep feeling safe and loved. Together at bedtime, taking relaxing breaths and discussing the day over a sweet story, you foster a familial sense of belonging and conscious connection that will support your children through the rest of their lives.
Each Book Has Interactive Components to Help with Emotional development, Create Mindful Behavior, and a Deeper Connection with Parents.
The four simple breaths of the Snuggle Breathing Meditation will help your kids to calm, reset and connect with you as storytime begins.
These are found on the back of each book so that you know exactly what values you are sharing with your little ones while reading a particular story.
Each book has an activity page with a little exercise you can do together, to embody the core lesson in the story.
In some of the books, you will find stickers at the back of the books to affirm the core lesson in the story through a short affirmation. The kids LOVE these!
With the star counter, the kids can keep track of every time you've read the story to see how many stars you've made shine by coloring the stars in or using stickers.
MEET THE AUTHOR
I love all things creative and spiritual, especially kids! I've now written 22 books that I hope help families connect at the end of those hectic days filled with growing, loving, and learning. I have been training and working in healing and community building for many years which is demonstrated in the amount of detail and attention I've given to each book.
These stories come to me in moments of clear sight and understanding. They feel like a gift to me, and I hope to pass that on to you and yours. Welcome to Conscious Stories!